Me, a dating coach for men?
As my websites have become more popular, and I’ve got the reputation for being the best dating coach for men, I’m getting a lot more questions than I ever used to. One of the things I like so much about doing this is having guys ask questions about what to do in a situation, or ask about a problem they’re having, or how to move forward with a certain girl.
In just about every single case, I can help the guy out and he’s successful. That makes me feel really good and I love it!
Like I said, my dating coach for men programs have taken off and I had a few guys ask if I would coach them for free in exchange for a testimonial or if I will cut them a deal. Personally, I love that they ask. I have always believed that you only get what you ask for and I respect the hell out of people who go for what they want.
And yes, I have worked out a payment plan and worked with guys so I could coach him, after all, I have been flat broke a few times in my life and know what that’s like. But I don’t coach men for free.
I recently got another request from a really, really great guy. A guy who I would love to work with, who could use a few tips from a dating coach, and who I know will get great results really fast, and over a few months we will entirely change his life and how he relates to women. But, as is the case with a lot of us right now, he just doesn’t have a lot of expendable income right now.
He sent me a really thoughtful email asking if I would help him out now, and he would pay me later, or in exchange for him writing about the results we got working together, or both. I can’t really remember.
Here’s what I wrote back:
Hi Tim,
I’m not sure what you are proposing. I do the work with you now, donate the time to up front, then if it works for you…. then you pay me?
That won’t get you the results you want. If it would, I would gladly do it. But I want the people I work with to GET RESULTS. (Plus, I don’t like wasting my time and seeing someone end up where they started.)
Here’s the problem with that proposal… when you get into one of my dating coach programs, I’m going to ask you to do things you’ve never done before and think in new and UNCOMFORTABLE ways. People don’t like to do new and uncomfortable things, in fact, they often won’t.
Unless…
They have an INVESTMENT in the coaching. It sounds crazy, but I’ve found it to be true. If I “help” a guy for nothing, the guy doesn’t do what I tell him to and ends up wasting his time, my time, and he ends up back where he started.
But…
How to make a dating coach work for you
When I charge for coaching… these guys do what I tell them to do. And as a result they kick ass with women in no time. The guy does what I say to do because after all, he’s paying for the advice.
On a couple of occasions I have helped guys with women for free up front, with the promise of a nice testimonial and full payment on the back end…
Here’s what happened the second, and last time, I did that…
The guy had been dating online for OVER A YEAR and started conversations with only 6 women that whole time. Using my personal coaching, having me write his messages for him, and coaching him on the phone, and him doing what I said to do, HE WENT ON 4 DATES with different women in the second week we worked together.
We went on to work more together, me giving my time for free. Within a month he got laid for the first time in a year. He was ecstatic.
But here’s what happened… he wrote me a nice testimonial and didn’t pay me a fucking dime. After that he just disappeared. Gone. Vanished.
Now, I’m not a glutton for punishment and believe strongly in the saying “Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.” I don’t mind making mistakes, I make a lot of them. But I don’t have the time or patience to make the same mistake twice.
So no more of me being a free dating coach for men who need a little help. Free advice here and there, sure, I do it all the time. I really like helping guys get good with women, I’m good at it, and I hate to think anyone has to live the way I did for all those years when I didn’t get women.
But to give you free coaching would actually do you a disservice. If you are truly interested in finding that special girl or learning how to seduce the perfect girl when you find her, you need to pay for it to have value for you. Otherwise you are just wasting your own time.
I really appreciate your offer to write me a testimonial and would ask that you do if we end up working together but, I have a shit-ton of them. No one knows what I know, and no one teaches it as well. What I need is to get conversations recorded and a couple guys to work with me to get this new system fine-tuned.
What getting a dating coach means for your life
I expect guys to pay for that privilege. I change guy’s lives FOREVER. For half a normal guy’s rent each month for the next 2 or 3 months, you could live an entirely different life for the rest of your life!
I know for a fact that if someone wants something bad enough, they will find a way to make it happen. If you are truly interested in learning how to handle women, you will find a way to come up with the money, even if you have to be creative.
Not to say that I won’t help you with things for free from time to time. I’d be happy to do that, I love doing that actually. But I expect to be busier than usual (and I already work 12-14 hours a day) in the next couple of months. Maybe by fall when I have some things in place and clicking I’ll have more time to devote to answering free questions though.
Give it some more thought. This is a life-changing opportunity you are looking at.
Talk to you later—JT
Kind of a long email, but you know that I am pretty thorough.
Now… with all that said, if you are interested in having me for a dating coach, you can check out my coaching programs. AND I am putting together a program on how to approach women, if you’re interested in getting in on that, send me a quick message with “Approaching Women” as the subject.
Later—JT
